I was recently given a copy of "Making Divorce Work: 8 Essential Keys to Resolving Conflict and Rebuilding Your Life" by Diana Mercer, JD, and Kate Jane Wennechuck, MA. I spent most of last weekend reading it, and finally finished up on Monday. This is a fairly comprehensive guide to making your way through the conflicts and emotional pitfalls of divorce, written by two experienced divorce mediators. In other words, it was tailor-made for a girl like me.
The book is organized well, flowing from examining the root causes of why your marriage failed through resolving conflicts, seeking peaceful solutions, figuring out what you want, and finally to crafting your "New Beginnings Mission Statement". This isn't a logistical how-to book full of legalese and forms. The only chapter dealing with legalities gives you a general overview on the points you need to touch on while negotiating your settlement. The rest of the book offers good, solid advice interspersed with personal stories of couples who have successfully been through this process. This book also functions as a workbook of sorts, asking thoughtful, essay-type questions that encourage you to dig into the issues that are coloring your choices and the decisions you've made that don't line up with where you want to be.
Overall, I found it a bit like a psychology textbook - it's not written like a typical "you can do it!" inspirational-type book, but there's plenty in it to inspire, and a lot that can help you really understand and control your part of the divorce process. The authors have a wealth of experience, and it shows.
This book is not yet in print, but according to Amazon.com, . If you're new to this process and want to find a way to peacefully mediate your divorce, I would definitely recommend you pick it up.